Warning – the following post contains a controversial opinion:

I don’t understand the appeal of apple cider slushies. 

To begin, I love Fall. I love bonfires, my local county fair, getting to wear hoodies, the smell of decaying leaves, dressing up for Halloween, and apple cider… hot (or at least room temperature) apple cider, that is. Fall and apple cider go together like peanut butter and jelly or Daryl Hall and John Oates, or Charlie Sheen and winning. Fall isn’t Fall without a steaming mug of apple cider.

For the life of me, though, I don’t understand how apple cider slushies are a thing. I love slushies and I love apple cider, but I HATE apple cider slushies. I actually had one for the first time two years ago and it was not a good experience. For starters, the weather is (finally!) starting to cool down, and guess what? Slushies are cold! Therefore, apple cider slushies make you feel… colder!

I don’t really know the origin of apple cider slushies, and I’ve only been aware of their existence for the last two years. A quick Google search of, “who invented apple cider slushies” turns up nothing but an obscene amount of recipes for the aforementioned beverage. Who spends their time thinking of these things? Do they have a life? Within the search results, however, I noticed a couple of variations that feature alcohol. Those bear investigating, for science!

For the last two days, I’ve seen more than a few Facebook posts about apple cider slushies. I find myself actively wondering what draws my friends to this unholy union of cider and ice. Is it the novelty factor (“This is neat!”)? Or, do they legitimately enjoy/crave this beverage? And for the love of God, don’t get me started on pumpkin spice everything.

As for me, I’ll be enjoying many proper (hot!) cups of apple cider this Fall!


What do you think? Are apple cider slushies actually good, or are they an abomination? Let us know in the comments!